1.    God is not ashamed of you

One thing that will surprise you is what God would say to you, which is, “I am not ashamed of you. All your sin has been taken care of. I want you to know my love for you. I am willing to climb onto the worst that you bring in order to transform it into something precious and perfect.”

God will use people in your life to reveal His glory. God will use people to break down your walls to help heal your wounds. God will use people to plant a seed, but only God has the power to make it grow. When you meet people that love you like Jesus, never let them go. God is not ashamed of you.

2.    Shame makes the devil smile  

What is shame? Shame is our inner judgement which we believe no one can bare to be near. Shame drives our compulsive behavior. Shame tells us, “You are never going to be enough.” Shame gives us entitlement to do wrong. Shame is the feeling of God’s hatred towards us.

You will feel shame when you embrace how you see yourself. You will feel true joy when you embrace how God sees you.

When we turn to human things to fill our emptiness, our shame, our boredom, or whatever it may be (sex, masturbation, porn, drugs, alcohol, wealth, food, work etc.), we do it once and it makes us feel good for a moment. Then, we feel bad so we do it again and again and again because that joy does not last long enough. It becomes an escape and an addiction that will ultimately kill you.

There is an unbelievable feeling of guilt and shame that also gives us a high and becomes our entire vocal point in the universe in that moment.

We cannot run away from the devil’s works in our lives by ourselves. We need our Father’s help.

When things are wickedly done to us or we do evil things to others, we become scared, intimidated and overwhelmed.

It brings the devil so much joy when we feel shame. It brings the devil joy when we fall into sin, contempt, violence, confusion and rip our human soul.

3.    Misinterpretation of God

When we are exposed to sexual inclinations at a young age, we do not fully understand what we are doing and what it means. This misrepresents the view of God and the gift of sexual relations.

Hearing that Jesus loves me did not resonate with me because I thought that He would judge me no matter what. My thoughts on His judgment of me caused me to run away from Christianity.  

Often, we tell ourselves that we are done trying to prove ourselves to God. Luckily, this is a lie. Another lie that I think we all have thought is, “The certainty of Satan is clearer than the certainty of God.”

Some of us are not afraid to die; we are terrified to see the face of disgust when we finally meet God.

When we live by our rules and our desires, we do not receive the goodness of God. We disguise God as someone that accuses us.

4.    We have this sense that we have something uniquely wrong with us

It is foolish for humans to think that pornography is more entertaining than the presence of God. Therefore, when we convince ourselves these lies (that there is more out there that is enjoyable or amusing than the manifestation of the Lord), we feel a resonating guilt that never goes away.

Although we fail to accept it, our past affects us significantly. Often, we understand that what we did was wrong, yet we do not contemplate how negatively it impacts our hearts and minds. Finding freedom from that shame is hard and we turn to earthly things to fill that brokenness such as: sex, alcohol, porn, shopping, drugs, lies, work, television

We have this sense that we have something uniquely wrong with us. I fear that when others get too close, something bad may happen to them. Thus, I become a great performer because I want everyone to love me. I become a performer in order for other to desire to talk to me. I want to be worth knowing and I tend to convince myself to be someone else because who I am will never be good enough.

We try so hard to manage expectations that we look okay.

5.    You are never too far gone to receive Jesus

Some of us are so broken to admit that we need relief. We become too proud of the person we despise within us to seek help. So, we continue this cycle of wickedness that we know is wrong, until we crash. Often, we feel so trapped within ourselves that we are aware of our wicked ways, but we continue this life until we absolutely have nowhere else to turn.

I have kept secrets hidden from those I love. I have learned that if you keep secrets, you are a liar and your life will implode with time. I keep secrets because they are disturbing and they make me hate the person that’s keeping them. I used to think that my secrets were too dirty for Jesus to accept them. I convinced myself (with the devil’s help) that I could never be worthy of Jesus’ forgiveness. Well, I was wrong. Titus 2:11 states, “For the grace of God has appeared, bringing salvation for ALL people.” (Including you!) In fact, the well-known apostle Paul admits, in 1 Corinthians, that he is not worthy of being called an apostle due to the way he mistreated God’s church. Nonetheless, God poured compassion and forgiveness into Paul which resulted into Paul working harder to share the Gospel with others while he continues to build his relationship with Christ. In other words, even the characters in the Bible were broken and sinful like you and me. God still used them for a higher purpose. So, do not think you are too far gone to receive Jesus. You are right where you need to be to surrender and receive the adoration of Jesus Christ.

6.    God is ALWAYS with you

God has a reassuring presence that is before us and behind us. He will never leave us no matter what we do or where we go. God the Father is within each and every one of us. We are the sons and daughters of God. God is with you in your darkness, shame, addiction, pain, unsettledness, wounded-ness and hidden secrets. God will never turn from you. He has come to give you joy, peace and transformation.

The goal of the Spirit is to open up the path before us, so that we understand the purpose of our lives. We are so small compared to the Father that beams over us.

7.    We desire a father

We all have a longing to belong and to feel comfortable in our own skin without hiding our secrets. There has always been a community of relationships which we are specifically designed for. We long for a father that enjoys you, appreciates you as a member of a family and nothing will hinder that.

Even if we did not have a wonderful or present father, we still desire to have a father. Our first experience with the Lord is typically through our father, a man, a boy or some masculine form. Even if it is not a good experience, we will still adapt to the presentation of God through that person—whether or not that person understands who they are.

When we do not have a good relationship with a father or a father figure, we are more open and inclined to believe any lie of the devil.

Even if you do not have an earthly father that displays unconditional love and adoration, you have a Father greater than any. You have the Father of the Kingdom and the Glory forever and ever.

8.    There is beauty in our shame

Once we are to the deep end of our shame, we do not have anything left to give. We are completely vulnerable and empty. You don’t realize how much you need Jesus, until Jesus is all you have left.

Hebrews 12 tells us that since we are watched by other people and by God that we should let go of the sins we cling so closely to. We should run quickly through the path the Lord created for us while “looking to Jesus, the founder and protector of our faith, who for the joy that was set before him endured the cross, despising the shame, and is seated at the right hand of the throne of God.” The Lord disciplines those he loves and accepts them as His child.

9.     Without the choice to say no to God, there is no meaning to say yes to Him

Saying no is a dangerous path – I’ve been on it – but then I took a 180 and went another direction. I followed Christ.

We do not know how to walk away from our past, our shame, our sin. But, you just have to make the choice to say yes to Jesus and He will deliver you from evil. He will make you new. He will forgive you if you ask. It can be hard to “risk” saying yes because you are consumed with your actions, the acceptance of Jesus’ forgiveness is worth it.

God collects our tears which are the essence of our brokenness that mean something. This is how redemption happens in the most shattered lives.

Enter the depths of His love and you will be deeply changed.

10.    God sends you an invitation

You feel the pull of Jesus, you hear the music of His Spirit, but you run from it. The music continues to play and you keep running until your legs give out. That is when you need Him. That is when you realize you cannot go on like this. He is there to pick you up and to care for you. Then, you understand the overwhelming compassion and grace God has for you.

We have a sense of invitation of God and we tend to believe all He will do is reject us. Whether we are a believer or not. We can be embedded of our brokenness. But, He doesn’t. Jesus is dressed like us. He will sit with us. He will eat with us anytime we want. The door is always open to enter the Kingdom or exit the Kingdom. You can leave anytime you want.

When we chose to run from Him, He is with you and he is not angry.  Jesus is fixed on us. He is loving us. He does not demand that we stop, but He invites us to understand how we got to the state of shame and what is beneath that. He invites us to search for what we are truly searching for. It is one thing to read “I am loved”, but for Him to be with us in addiction, in sickness, and relapse, and brokenness over and over again – that changes you. He has the power and forgiveness and love and grace and mercy to transform and redeem you.


Every human being has a story. I am not perfect. Although I am a follower of Jesus Christ, I sin each day. Habitually, I rely on my own desires to feel happy. I fall and I let the devil whisper in my ears. But, Jesus is still with me. He forgives me over and over again. He loves me unconditionally. When I was sexually assaulted, He was with me. When I brainstormed my suicide, He was with me. When I wanted to end my life, Satan was thrilled because I would enter the fire of hell. But, God invited me to stay so that one day I would say yes to Jesus.

God can grow humanity, destiny, purpose, and redemption inside any heart, mind, body and soul. So, let go and surrender and say yes to the Lord’s invitation.


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Ten things I learned from the film The Heart of Man: